Terminator Salvation DVD Review

Terminator Salvation: Being a terminator fan I waited a long time to finally watch this latest chapter in the saga. I did not wait long enough....my eyes still hurt from watching this clunker. This is the 1st Terminator to take place after "Judgement Day" - and hopefully the last. The story was terrible, Christian Bale was awful and the action sequences were meaningless. I really have a tough time thinking of anything good to say about this picture. What a shame that this was my 1st Blu-Ray watch.

"Kick It To The Floor"

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The Proposal on DVD

The Proposal: The not-so-likable Sandra Bullock bores in another dull romantic comedy. Let me start with the oh-so-clever setup: Bullock is an editor in New York who is about to get deported back to Canada unless she can find a legal way to stay in the country. Her Idea: get married to her assistant (Ryan Reynolds) who actually loathes her. Because he sees this as an opportunity for advancement he goes along with the idea. First order of business is to visit his family with his new fiancee. It just so happens that he is from Alaska. A snotty editor from NYC has to go to the Alaskan countryside and fit in with his family....oh my side hurts from laughter (not). Now imagine if only they could actually fall in love for real.....well you can see the writing on the wall.....and it is bad penmanship! Awful acting coupled with a couple embarrassing scenes equals a movie that disappoints.....I propose staying away!

"Kick it to the Floor"

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The Girlfriend Experience on DVD

The Girlfriend Experience: Director Steven Soderbergh has been known to try risky projects in the past (see Bubble) - this latest offering is no exception. Sasha Grey (a current adult film star) plays a high-end call girl in her mainstream film debut. The first word that comes to mind about her performance is "monotone". Some may argue that she is playing her character this way....I say, no - she just can't act. Also crippling the movie is the weak story which concentrates on her relationship with her boyfriend (yes she has a boyfriend.....and she is a call girl....and he knows). I found it hard to care for any of the characters on screen.....and as a result I did not care much for the movie!

"Kick it to the Floor"

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Blindness

Blindness: Simply put, this was the worst movie that I have seen in a good 10 years. I hated it! Was it trying to make some sort of social message….I am still not sure. Maybe it was an experiment, to see if a horrible movie like this could actually blind you. As for the plot – the entire human race is going blind. The disease is contagious so the government quarantines the blind by themselves in an old hospital. Without their sight they become savages – fighting amongst themselves for survival. To add insult to injury, Danny Glover has a small role that has him wearing an eye patch and mumbling some meaningless rhetoric. Stay far away from this rubbish - it will blind you!

“Kick it to the Floor”

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Flash of Genius

Flash of Genius: I always complain that Hollywood turns out too many remakes and sequels. I want more innovative ideas. Well, when they finally decide to go with an original story we get this: The true narrative on Bob Kearns, the man who invented the intermittent windshield wiper. Lookout! He did not invent the actual wiper mind you, just the way a wiper has a small pause, used when it is a light shower outside. At the time the big three automakers in Detroit were trying to come up with the same invention. Bob beat them to it and presented his idea to Ford. Instead of selling them his idea (easy way), he wanted to open his own manufacturing plant and sell the actual wipers to them (huh?) . The rest of the story goes traditional – evil corporation steals the man’s idea and gives him no credit or money for it - man sues big corporation in a case that took almost 10 years to get to court. There is really no reason to recommend this movie, not that it was terrible by any means. I am just not sure the story deserves its own movie.

Giving it a slight “kick to the floor”

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Eagle Eye

Eagle Eye: Shia LaBeouf stars in one of the more unrealistic movies I have ever seen. The plot is shrouded in secrecy during the 1st hour of the film and that gave me some hope. In fact I would say the opening 45 minutes or so were actually decent. However once the plot starts to become clear the story turns into a real laugher. LaBeouf plays Jerry Shaw whose twin brother was recently killed in military action. Soon after Jerry is setup to make it look as if he is a terrorist. That is when he gets a call from a mysterious voice that helps guide his escape. Where is this voice coming from, and how can it see his every action? I really wish the explanation was better….I ….I ….actually nothing more needs to be explained - just skip this one.

“Kick it to the Floor”

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Step Brothers

Step Brothers: Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly team up again to bring us a boorish comedy that has very few laughs. The biggest problem I had with the movie was how dim-witted the two lead characters are portrayed. The concept for the movie could have worked if they did not stoop to such low levels of stupidity for laughs (or what they thought were laughs). Ferrell and Reilly each play guys who still live at home with their single parents (one with his mom, the other with his dad). When the parents meet and fall in love the four of them must learn to live together in one house. Some of the humor came out of left field and gave me a chuckle. However the movie as a whole is not very coherent. I would have liked to see Ferrell and Reilly put a little more effort in developing their characters and thus adding some variety to the jokes other than what we were given. Looking for a good laugh? Look elsewhere……this is one of Ferrell’s worst.

“Kick it to the Floor”

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Get Smart

Get Smart…..better yet: Get bored, really bored! Steve Carell and Anne Hathaway star in the big screen version of the 1970’s hit TV show. Carell plays Maxwell Smart who is promoted to “agent” and is needed immediately to help solve an internal crime at the agency. He is partnered with Agent 99 (Hathaway) to try to find out how vital information about the agents and their identities was stolen. Maybe it is because we have seen the “silly detective partnered with a more skilled partner” scenario so much, but the humor just came off as stale. The irony being that it was the original TV show that inspired a lot of knockoffs throughout the years that in return hurt this film’s originality. I was really hoping for some funny moments from Carell, but the majority of the laughs supplied were of the slight chuckle variety, although I did have a laugh during the film's main dance sequence. Meanwhile, the action portion of the movie tried too hard. I was actually annoyed by having surround sound at this point. All of this added up to a big yawn.

“Kick it to the Floor”

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v Pooped!!.............................

The Happening

The Happening: Oh, I see what is “Happening” here – M. Night Shyamalan makes another terrible movie….this guy is on a roll!! Mark Wahlberg stars as a high school science teacher, who along with his wife tries to flee the Philadelphia area because of a strange outbreak that is occurring outdoors. Strange might not be the right word – the outbreak causes people to stop what they are doing and then in a trance like motion kill themselves by any means possible. Nobody is sure why this is happening, but it seems to start in heavily populated areas and in parks. Our heroic science teacher latches on to the theory that it is the plants and trees fighting back against the human population. Wahlberg adds some humor to the film as he plays his character in a very corny way and his line delivery is comical. The movie is not very scary or eerie or suspenseful…….what it is -- is crappy.

“Kick it to the Floor” ….. "Then stomp on it”

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Rambo

Rambo: On the heels of the successful Rocky revival, Sylvester Stallone tries to do it again – this time with the Green Beret John J. Rambo. The story picks up with Rambo working on a river in Thailand, obviously wanting to be left alone. A group of missionaries looking to get into war-torn Burma ask Rambo if he would be kind enough to drive them there on his riverboat. John Rambo, being a softie, caves when the pretty girl missionary asks him nicely. Once in Burma the missionaries are captured (shocker) and only Rambo can save them (bigger shocker). The film is short (85 min) and to the point, with an onslaught of action and violence. I did not like that the action focuses on big groups of people being gunned down at one time. I would much rather have seen Rambo use his Green Beret instincts to make calculated and precise kills. The movie felt like it was thrown together in a week’s time for the sole purpose of making a little coin for John J.

“Kick it to the Floor”

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The Astronaut Farmer

The Astronaut Farmer: If you were 10 years old, loved to play with rockets, and in your free time pretended you were a farmer, you would still think this movie sucks! With this film Billy Bob Thornton once again adds to the theory that he chooses his roles with a dart in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other. The title says it all, Thornton plays a farmer who builds his own rocket (out of NASA throwaways) in his barn. When he is finally ready to launch it draws not only the attention of the U.S. government, but of the whole nation. I get that we are suppose to look past a lot of the technical details and focus on the message of the story (everyone can achieve their dream), but I just couldn’t. This is a movie that should have been grounded.

“Kick it on the Floor”

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